What I would rather be doing besides chemistry...

Obviously, this post makes you believe that I am stuck in lab, doing some lab work or working on chemistry-related topics. At the moment, I'm obviously not, but I'll be there soon enough. (Waiting to eat lunch first, you obviously see where my priorities are. Hahaha)

However, I know a lot of times I get jealous/envious of people and their wonderful lives. All the fun things that people get to do (Keeneland meets, football games, basketball games, concerts, Harvest Homecoming, etc. The list goes on and on) while I feel like I'm stuck at school doing work, or stuck at home doing work. I feel angry at chemistry, as to why I have to stay and do things that are MUCH less fun then the things I noted before. For example: I'd rather be sitting on my porch, with a cup of coffee, reading a book for enjoyment. I can't remember the last time I did that.

But then I continue to realize that:

1) This is my job. I am getting paid (my school paid for + a stipend), and so it won't always be enjoyable. I can't remember a job that I always enjoyed going to day in and day out. So it's okay that I'm not always super stoked to go in (especially on the weekends. yuck)

2) This is a big dream of mine. I want to accomplish this. I want to get my Ph.D. I want to get something that only a small percentage of people have in the world. I want to be part of an elite group of smart people (though I don't think I'll ever be as smart as some of the people out there). Making dreams come true doesn't come easy, and it requires time, hard work and lots of sacrifice. I'm only 24, and I have a lot more of my life to live after this. So working on acquiring my Ph.D. until I'm 28 is a big sacrifice, but a sacrifice I'm willing to go through with.

3) I don't know what I would do with my life if I wasn't doing something science-based. I always say that I'd become an event planner if Chemistry didn't work out. But let's be honest, all I have are good organizational skills and good planning skills. PRETTY SURE that's not all you need to go into event planning for an actual career. I've been science-based pretty much my entire life. I remember going to science shows when I was younger, going to the Louisville Science Center on the weekends and watching IMAX movies about the Amazon or space (obviously always narrated by Morgan Freeman or Harrison Ford), playing science and math-based video games on the computer (number munchers, the Amazon Trail, Geometry Blaster... and that's where my weirdness comes from, y'all), etc. etc. etc. I grew up with science, so it only makes sense for me to continue with science, regardless of how "depressed" it makes me.

Let's be honest: science is HARD. But, if I (and other people who "like" science) am not doing it, who would be? Who would come up with all these new findings about space, about drug-delivery systems using small organic compounds that are less harmful than radiation treatment, about new species of plants/animals, about how the earth was composed billions of years ago vs. now... We need people to do science, and I just happen to be one of them. But it's not easy, and we scientists get frustrated. I know I surely do, and being around/talking to a lot of other people in the sciences, it's very frustrating, and we'll all probably becoming functioning alcoholics who also happen to be addicted to coffee. But if that's how we get through it, that's how we get through it.

I can't speak for any other type of work/study besides my own, but I can imagine that each brings frustrations with them. But we just have to remember that there IS more to life than just our studies, our work... it's what the rest of the world has to offer. And while we may not be able to partake in some of the finer things in life right now, we'll get our chance soon enough. We just have to push through the difficult times now, and always look for that light at the end of the tunnel.

So, today, if you have to do some less-than-enjoyable things (for example, go into lab for a few hours), make the most of it. Play your favorite music while doing it. Multitask, and do something you like to do as well. Get your favorite coffee/hot beverage before/after your work, and just enjoy the day for what it is.

All you scientists out there (and all you non-scientists too), just take it a day at a time, but remember, that there are good things ahead, even if they're not in your direct line of sight. They'll find you, but be ready for them.

As for me, it's almost lunch time (YESSSSSSSSSSSSS) and then time for me to head in to start some reactions. Until next time (which for me may be a while... I'm not good at this "regular blogging stuff" lol)

Always thinking, always moving.

What a crazy busy September! It turned to October and fall on me! From the UofL UK game, Annie's coming back to KY party, Sugar Ray concert, a high school friend's wedding, Oktoberfest Zinzinnati with friends coming to visit, and a trip to Columbus, hasn't been much time to do much else (besides some needed chemistry work, of course).

The main thing that has kept me busy since school started again is just my program in general. Classes + teaching + research = a full 10-12 hour day most days. Then it's time to come home, go to sleep, and do it all again the next day. While I know I complain about it (a lot... it's true. Some of you have probably heard more than your fair share of my whining), I think about what else I could be doing with my life instead.

I could be at my old job, working 8 hour days, just getting through the day, and repeating 5 days a week. Not loving what I'm doing, but tolerating it enough until something better comes my way. I could have been working for Brown-Forman, had that worked out, and probably be pretty happy. I could have gone to UofL to get my Masters' degree, and then be in the workforce in another year.

And then I take a look at where I am today. I worked my butt off to switch from the Masters' program to the Ph.D. program. I'm in a research group that I feel comfortable in and enjoy the research (most of the time). I'm teaching organic chemistry recitations and labs, and helping new students learn how awesome it is. (Believe me, it's freaking awesome) While it's VERY FAR down the road, I see a potential future that I couldn't see when I started the program.

So many times, it's easy to complain about how tough life is. I do it ALL THE TIME. I know I try not to, and it's hard to break that habit. But sometimes, it's nice to take a day, not do anything but watch your favorite TV shows, talk to some friends you haven't had the chance to catch up with in a long time, drink some freshly brewed coffee on a cool, fall day... and just take life in. Just let it happen to you... it doesn't have to be productive, it just has to... be, I guess.

Fall is one of my favorite seasons, and I think it's a very good thinking season as well. Go porchsit with a hot cup of cocoa; sit by the fire, roasting marshmallows and watching the fire burn; watching the leaves change colors day by day; getting ready for the best holiday, Thanksgiving, and what all we have to be thankful for in our lives. For me, it's the introspective season.

It's nice to just think about things... so if you need to, take a day and relax, and just think. Think about the present: how you got there and where you want to go. But also make sure you chill in the present for a bit, since it's so easy to look towards tomorrow. Revel in what is going on around you... this day is unique in its own way.

In a world where it's easy to forget about the good and focus on the bad, try to flip the script from time to time. You'll be amazed to see what you'll find.